MELONEY LEMON: SWEET AND SOUR.

MELONEY LEMON: SWEET AND SOUR.

Thursday, 25 January 2007

Burns Night

Why not, I thought, they're a quarter Scottish.
Give the kids a haggis.

"Some hae meat
and canna eat"

It's a kind of sausage - ketchup anyone?

"Auld Scotland wants nae
Skinking Ware
That jaups in luggies
But if ye wish her grateful prayer
(don't!) Gie her a haggis"

The Essex genes remain dominant, closely
followed by the Teutonic ones.
Flecks of nicotine coloured neep rest evilly
next to the freshly heated orange fish fingers.

They eat the potatoes.

I scrape ketchup bloodied haggis into the
bin - to the sound of fading bagpipes
in the glen ( overlaid with Eastenders theme tune.)

It's early nights all round.

(What rhymes with haggis then?)

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Next year try them with deep fried haggis balls in breadcrumbs, it's the canape of choice at all the best parties up here......

haggis rhymes with Waggis, as in," he will waggis finger at me if I am wrong"... i admit a change of tense is necessary, but hey, who'se splitting hairs?

lotsalove
R.Lemon .....OR,..." GandT with ice and a slice, please" ie AAAAAhHHHHHHH, - lemon!

Minx said...

Ah well, you win some, you lose some.
It's Australia Day today. Did you feed them some Wallabis?

Debi said...

So haggis is sheep's lungs. And you boiled them.

Tell your children they're welcome here any time. (Oh - they knew that already ...) Poor little things ... They may have a Playstation, but look what mummy feeds them ...

PS This is not Scottishist - just the response of a committed veggie to the thought of boiled sheep's lungs ...

Cailleach said...

When you call them boiled sheeps lungs they don't sound very nice at all. But then when you think about sausages which are basically pig intestines, filled with bits of leftover pig, breadcrumbs and beetroot juice...
Hmmm.

Meloney Lemon said...

....And not only lungs - liver, kidneys and barley, I believe. An ethnic recipe derived from using every part of an animal you could in order to survive, in a land that supported little but sheep, barley and the odd turnip
.... As the MacMelon hordes crashed Hadrian's wall, Tacitus records mass looting of organic olive oil and hothoused grapes....a early form of supermarket shopping.

Minx said...

I have just given the meat eaters in my house some dead pig. I served it up with gravy that is supposed to taste like false dead pig.Tomorrow they will eat dead cow.I am sure meat is very good for them - all those extra hormones and antibiotics.

Meloney Lemon said...

Bacon sandwich on white sliced.
With extra hormones, nitrites, sodium and mould inhibitor on the side please.....

Lighten up everybody..we're lucky we have an abundance of vegetarian fare to choose from...now let's go to Kenya and visit the Masai..bowl of cows blood anybody?...

Debi said...

The Bush Tucker trial comes to Blogland. Had to happen I suppose ...

My problem is that I didn't go veggie on ethical or environmental grounds (though they come in handy) but just cos I couldn't stand the thought of eating flesh ... excuse me ... I have some violent retching to do ...